The other day, when I arrived home after a counseling session, I said to my wife Jessi, “Babe, you know what I love about counseling?
Well, I love a lot of things about counseling, but the thing I was just thinking about is...” Before I could finish my sentence, the idea for a new blog series was born!
Out of all the types of counseling, couples counseling is probably my favorite. And when it comes to couples counseling, I have a special love for working with engaged couples in premarital counseling. There's something wonderful about coming alongside a couple right as they are starting out, helping them to build a solid foundation for their marriage, helping them see the patterns they are already beginning to establish and to adjust those in healthy ways. A seemingly small adjustment at the beginning of a journey can lead you somewhere drastically different further down the road.
But it's not just the couple that benefits from our conversations about foundational marriage principles. I do too! We all need reminders from time to time. Even for those who have been married for years, a lot of marriage counseling isn't new information so much as it is noticing how they have gotten away from what they used to know.
So when I talk with a couple about how true love seeks to put the other first, I come home with eyes open to how I could be doing that better. When I talk with a couple about “love languages” and learning to show love in the way their spouse best receives it, rather than the way that is easiest for the giver, I come home inspired afresh to get creative in how I show my love to Jessi. When I share a story about how Jessi and I learned to understand each other and navigate our differences, little irritations are put into perspective again and I come home so thankful for our marriage.
Marriage reminders. What a gift. Just one of the things I love about counseling.